My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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