I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize