why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize
