2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize