I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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