HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
