this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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