Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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