Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Barsexuality is the new black.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
a search helicopter?!
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I touched a dick in church today
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
