thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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