You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
