A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Randomize
