you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
