i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Randomize
