it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
