I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
