Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
