it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
well you can't waste a boner
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
this is an emotional support booty call
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
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