you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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