I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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