The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
