Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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