no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
