is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
