you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
