I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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