OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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