Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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