You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
