Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Randomize
