Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
