I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
