Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
is it fun? or sober?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
