I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
the condom got lost in my hair
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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