I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize
