so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
