I need help removing her.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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