my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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