This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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