Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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