At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
