I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
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Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
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I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
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