Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
this beer tastes like vomit already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I booty called her while she was in labor.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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