and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
