No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
