btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
