He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
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