I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
vagina is talking i cant
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize