Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I just want to make out with him forever
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
