Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize