WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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