Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
