tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
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